Per Sempre
by quiet-raindrop
Summary: A trip the circus, distant memories, an old legend . . . something is up and Barbara is trying to figure it out.


**Author's Note: **The circus has been on my mind . . . and then I wrote this. It's more ridiculous then I let on.

**Disclaimer: **I don't have nearly enough money (or talent) to own Batman

Per Sempre

* * *

To be honest, as soon as she heard him speak she asked him to repeat it.

"_I thought we could go to the circus."_

Nope, she had heard correctly the first time.

"Ah, okay." Barbara said as she stopped to stare down into her cell phone as if there might be something wrong with the reception.

If anyone else had uttered these words there would have been no problem, but the fact that they came out of Richard Grayson's mouth was troubling.

She rolled off her back and stared at the calendar on her wall. There was nothing of significance about the date in any way.

After agreeing to a specific time, Barbara hung up and sat on the edge of her bed in thought.

"Hey, Barb do you need me to grab anything else?"

She looked up at her father who had just poked his head into her room. She blinked a few times before it registered what he had said.

"Ah, no. Just what is on the list is fine. It's fine."

"Something else?" Her father asked perceptively.

Barbara bit her lip.

"I called Dick to see what he wanted to do today and he said that he wanted to go . . . to the circus."

The significance of this did not pass her father by.

"Did he seem okay?" He asked carefully.

Barbara shrugged. He sounded fine. What had brought this on?

"Are you going to go?"

"It was his idea, so I guess."

Both Barbara and her father went silent as they both pondered the same thing.

* * *

The drive to Wayne Manor didn't take long, and by the time Barbara had walked up to the door, Alfred was already waiting to open it. In fact, he stepped out before

she could even ring the doorbell.

"Hello Alfred." Barbara greeted.

The British butler gave her a crisp nod as he shut the door behind himself.

"Miss Gordon, do you have any idea what brought this on?"

Barbara had to smile. Alfred's dismissal of the usual pleasantries showed just how serious this situation was.

"I'm afraid I don't Alfred. He didn't really explain and I wasn't going to push it."

Alfred gave a nod of understanding.

"I just hope that he is alright. He seems fine, not that we've really talked about it." Alfred glanced around. "Oh. Forgive me, we should go inside." He re-opened the

door and let her in.

Barbara stood in the entryway as she waited for Dick to show up. She heard a series of 'thumps' as someone came down the stairs in a hurry. It was Tim.

Stopping in front of her, he looked around the room and then whispered in a confidential tone.

"What is going on? Do you know why he is doing this?"

Barbara shook her head.

"Not really, but if he really wants to go we'll go."

"But . . ."

"Listen Tim. We can't walk on egg shells around him for the rest of his life. He's not a little kid anymore, and if wants to go he can go." Barbara said firmly.

They all tried to be careful around him when that certain time of the year rolled around. No one would bring up any conversation about that past life—they always let

him do that if he wanted to. Barbara was never sure how Dick felt about that kind of treatment. Sometimes, she had the impression that it got on his nerves.

"But why now and out of the blue? There's no reason to it." Tim continued.

She couldn't argue with him.

"Well, then we will just go. I'll be there with him, so nothing should happen."

"Bruce wanted me to tell you that if you needed anything to call." Tim relayed.

"Sure thing." Barbara replied.

Both of them stopped talking as Dick entered the room.

"All ready to go?" He said, greeting her with a quick kiss.

"Yeah." She nodded. Looking at him carefully, she tried to notice any signs of sadness or gloom—there wasn't any.

"Something wrong with this shirt?" He asked her catching her eye.

"No, nothing it's fine." She said, answering quickly to avoid his suspicion.

"Okay then." He said with a smile.

Dick stopped to put a hand on Tim's head. "Be good okay? And watch out for Alfred, he seems ornery today." He added with a wink.

"Sure." Tim said giving a quick glance in Barbara's direction.

Barbara followed Dick outside keeping a few steps behind him.

She wanted to know what had brought this on and what he hoped to accomplish—but she didn't dare ask.

"You're awfully quite this evening. Are you still tired from last night?" Looking concerned, he paused to look back at her.

"Ah, a little." Barbara said catching his words. "Patrol in the rain is never fun. It seems to suck all energy out of me."

Why was he acting worried about _her_? Shouldn't he realize that everyone was worried about _him_?

"Am I driving or are you?" She asked him.

He shrugged.

"I don't really care if you don't."

"Okay, so I guess I will." Barbara replied to his non-answer.

Dick said nothing so Barbara just led the way to her gray Impala that she had parked on the driveway. Dick affectionately called it the "dump truck" to which

Barbara would snidely reply that she couldn't afford to buy a car every other week like _some _people could.

"Is your seatbelt on?" She asked as she checked her rearview mirrors.

"You are like riding with a grandma Babs, come on lets go." He encouraged.

Barbara paused.

Was he excited?

Maybe he was ready to try and move on somewhat. She shouldn't pry about his reasons for wanting to go. She should just be supportive if he needed her to be.

"Keep your shorts on boy wonder. We're going." She teased as she started the engine.

Dick gave out an 'hmp' that caused her to laugh.

* * *

Barbara pulled up to the circus and glanced over at Dick—he still looked okay.

She got out slowly hoping that he was going to explain something or . . . something.

But he didn't. He bought their tickets and they took their seats.

Barbara looked around the massive arena under the big tent of red and yellow. The smell of popcorn filled the air along with the laughter of children who were being

entertained by a group of jugglers before the show started. She then glanced around at the people who were filling up the seats—families, grandparents, school

kids, college students—everyone was here.

Barbara glanced over at Dick. He wasn't looking around at all. He was staring straight up into the tent.

Barbara's eyes followed his gaze to the intricate ropes and platforms that were stationed over their heads high in to air.

Maybe she should say something to him . . . but what? No, she would be quiet and let him say something if he wanted to—but she was curious and concerned.

"Hey, I never asked if you wanted popcorn." Dick pointed out with a childlike smile.

"Sure." Barbara said deciding it was best to let him do what he wanted. He seemed like he was in a normal happy mood, but he couldn't be—could he?

He gave her a nod and stood up being careful not to step on anyone's feet in their row.

* * *

He made it back just in time for the show to start. As the lights dimmed, he nudged her knee and slanted the bowl of popcorn in her direction. She smiled as she

took a piece, but in all honesty she wasn't that hungry.

The show started with a bang and suddenly all at once the entire arena seemed to fill up with color and sound. It was if the performers and the entire audience were

swept away into a different world of magic.

Barbara would try to pull her eyes away and look at Dick every once in a while. His eyes always stayed glued to the stage.

She wished he knew what he was thinking and what this all was about.

Occasionally, he would mutter something under her breath. It was always quiet enough that she never quite caught what he said.

She felt her heart skip a beat when the first acrobat leaped. Almost like she was afraid, she reached over and grabbed Dick's hand.

A few seconds in, she felt one of his fingers tapping the back of their intertwined hands. At first, she thought he was trying to get her attention, but then she realized

that he was tapping out the timing of the acrobat's performance.

Barbara watched as they leapt and always seemed to find another bar to grab a hold of. Seamlessly, they jumped and dove swinging from each other's hands.

It was the kind of flying the Dick always compared to their using grappling hooks to cross roof tops. She wondered what it would be like to jump and have nothing in

your hand. It gave her chills to think about it.

"Better hurry up."

Barbara snapped her head around at Dick's voice. His eyes were still on the acrobats and she realized that he was talking to them.

Focusing in on them, she realized that one of the acrobats seemed to be working quickly like he was out of sync.

"There you go." Dick muttered as the man fell back into the timing. The exact same timing that Dick was tapping out.

Barbara grinned. _He _hadn't lost any timing at all.

A flash from the stage drew her eyes back down to terra firma.

Tons of clowns filled the stage with their antics.

Barbara looked over at Dick who exchanged a glance with her.

The Joker had really ruined clowns for them, but Barbara was pretty certain that none of the rainbow haired, red-nosed, big shoed clowns were going to pose any

threat—but it was really hard not to be a little on edge.

* * *

The whirling, twirling, glitter, lights, and theatrics lasted for another hour till one final bang finished off the show.

They both stood up with the rest of the cheering audience. Dick sat back down and watched as people began to filter out.

Barbara sat back down next to him.

By the time half the audience had filled out, they were still sitting. Barbara got the impression that Dick had was in no hurry to leave.

She sat there patiently just waiting. Waiting for him to say anything. Barbara rested her chin on her hand and watched the rest of the audience leave.

"Come on." Dick stood up suddenly and offered her his hand.

Barbara took it instantly and was surprised to see an excited grin across his face. He pulled her from her seat quickly and led the way to the ground level.

"Stay here for a moment." Dick instructed before walking off.

Barbara crossed her arms as she watched him leave. He was up to something.

Watching him carefully, he walked over and called up to one of the men working on taking one of the spotlights down. She couldn't tell exactly what he was saying.

He was speaking a different language.

The man shouted down a reply and it seemed to be the one Dick wanted for he gave out a grin.

He dashed back to her, and Barbara couldn't hold back a smile.

"Come on Babs, follow me." He demanded tugging her arm.

"Hold on."

He stopped cold and dropped her hand.

"What is going on?" She asked him suspiciously.

"Just please, Babs." He said sweetly.

She gave a sigh. She was such a sucker for those blue eyes. Giving in, she let him pull her along.

They walked along the edge of the circus ring until Dick stepped across the line and into the ring. Barbara stopped short.

"Uh, Dick?"

"What?" He stopped to face her. She pointed to the ground. "What?" He asked again.

"I don't think you can just walk into the ring." She pointed out.

"Ah, yes, my ever rule-abiding girlfriend." Dick said in a stiff voice. "Don't worry, I asked." He added with a smile. "Not my best Russian, but it wasn't terrible. We

had a fire-eater who was Russian. My mother never did let me try that."

Barbara smiled at the last part which was spoken thoughtfully.

"I wonder why." She said with sarcasm.

"Hey, it's not too dangerous if you do it properly."

Barbara shook her head.

"Important word being _if_."

Dick made a face.

"Who did you get permission from?"

Dick nodded his head in the direction of the man working on the lights.

"Shouldn't you ask someone more . . . important?" Barbara asked as she tried to find the right word.

Dick cocked his head like he was trying to understand.

"Oh . . ." He said after a moment. "You mean like . . . it's okay. If you are in the circus than you _are _the circus. No one is more important than anyone else—at least

not to us. He has a part in this show too even if you never notice him. So if he says I can, then I can, because he'll look out for the circus same as anyone. He'll

make sure no harm comes to it."

Barbara felt a little ashamed. She didn't mean to insult the guy.

"So, come on." Dick encouraged.

They walked along towards the center of the arena. Barbara got a feel for just how big this stage was. There was so much room, yet from your seat in the audience,

you felt like everything was so close.

She spotted a few more workers coming out and taking down various parts of the set. She kept expecting someone to yell at them or ask them what they were

doing, but nobody did. Everyone seemed easy going; few people even looked their way with a smile.

Dick came to a stop in the dead center of the tent.

Barbara looked up.

It was like the circus tent had no stopping point. Up higher and higher it soared into an endless spiral of red and yellow.

"Hey, Babs?" Dick asked softly.

Barbara lowered her gaze.

"Hold, on. My eyes are awash in color at the moment." She said as she tried to blink to refocus. "How on earth were you able to flip and spin with all that color going

on?"

"You actually don't really pay attention to that at all." He explained with a shrug.

Barbara supposed that made sense.

She realized that she had asked a question about the semi-forbidden topic and he had answered it without hesitation.

"Babs?" Dick pulled her back from her thoughts.

Turning to him, she found him staring intently at her.

Without warning, he cupped her face and kissed her fiercely. It was a long thorough kiss that made Barbara fairly certain that she was going run out of air before

Dick decided he was done.

"Dick!" She hissed in a half surprised, half scolding manner after he was finished.

He gave no explanation, but quirked a smile as if he was pleased.

"Do you think that I should bring Tim home some cotton candy?"

Barbara blinked as her mind tried to change subjects.

"What? Ah, yea you should. Last time we bought some at that boardwalk you ate it all and then he didn't get any."

"Who knew Tim could be so petty?" Dick said in response.

"You told him you would bring him some!" Barbara reminded him.

"And I was planning on it. Circumstances got out of my control." Dick said in defense.

"I told you to eat lunch before we went."

"I'm not winning this argument am I?"

"Do you ever?" She wanted to know.

"Alright, alright. I will go get some cotton candy for Tim." Dick said.

Barbara gave a nod at his correct response.

Leaning over, he gave her a quick kiss. Then he quickly looked straight up and then back down at her.

"What are you doing?" She asked now curious.

"Nothing" He said, although she could tell that it was lie.

She stared at his back as he walked away. What was he hiding? What had this trip been all about anyway?

Giving a huff, she made up her mind to demand an answer from him.

"Excuse me."

Barbara froze and turned around to see a kid who had come up behind her. He reminded her of Tim—if Tim was blond.

"I'm sorry. I'm I in your way?" She asked fearfully. She was going to kill Dick if she got in trouble.

The boy seemed to take a moment to process what she said.

"No. It's . . ." The kid stopped as he tried to fumble for the right word.

Barbara smiled as she waited patiently.

The boy looked behind himself as an older man stood by watching him. The older man waved a hand as to encourage the boy to hurry up.

The kid rolled his eyes. It was a look that Barbara recognized from any teenage kid who had ever been forced to do something that they didn't want to do.

The old man barked something that Barbara faintly recognized as Italian.

The kid sighed.

Barbara decided that the boy was _exactly _like Tim only blond and Italian.

"My uh, grandfather says that . . ." The boy scuffled his feet and looked embarrassed. "That he hopes you . . . like that guy."

"And why is that?"

"Ah . . ." The boy looked back at his grandfather as if he really did not want to be the one saying this.

"Please tell me." Barbara said hoping to put the boy at ease.

The boy's grandfather put down the hammer that he was using to take down the set and walked over to where they stood. He gave the boy a swat on the back of

his head.

"Nonno!" The boy spat while rubbing the back of his head.

The grandfather laughed and spoke rapidly to Barbara.

She bit her lip.

"You're going to have to translate that. He was speaking too quickly; I only got a few words." She explained.

The boy looked reluctant.

"He says that there is an old circus legend that says that if you kiss someone under the very highest point of the tent that . . ."

"That what?" She asked eagerly as the boy's cheeks flushed with color.

"That those two people will be in love for . . ." The boy grew silent again awkwardly.

Barbara flushed slightly, as a warm feeling grew inside her.

"For how long?" She asked softly.

"Per Sempre." The old man said firmly.

"Forever?" Barbara said with a growing smile. She could live with that.

The old man nodded.

"Sempre." He repeated.

"Grazie." She replied to both of them.

The boy gave a nod as his grandfather started talking rapidly again.

The boy looked at his grandfather and gave a shrug.

He received another whack on his head.

"Grandfather says . . . that he would be a foolish man . . . to give you up." The boy translated.

"Well, I'll be sure to tell him that if he ever tries." Barbara responded with a smile.

The boy nodded and then repeated her words back to the older man who grinned broadly with a laugh. The older man said something quite exuberantly and gave

Barbara a kiss on both cheeks; then he walked back to where he was.

"I'm sorry." The boy said, looking more uncomfortable than ever.

Barbara gave a cough to hide a laugh and waved him off.

"No, thank you. I don't mind at all. He is very sweet. He gets you into trouble sometimes doesn't he?" Barbara said trying to hide a smile.

The boy nodded.

"He is so . . . nosey. He should not pry." Italian-Tim said with an exhausted sigh.

"Babs?"

Barbara turned to see Dick walking over to her. A questioning look was on his face.

The boy gave her a small bow and rushed back to be with his grandfather.

"Are you bugging people?" Dick asked as he watched the boy run off.

"He reminds me of Tim."

Dick stared at the kid a bit longer.

"Maybe." He decided with a shrug. "If Tim was blond and . . ."

"Italian." Barbara filled in.

"I am going to go home and tell Tim that you would like him better if he was blond and Italian." Dick said mischievously.

"I didn't say that!" Barbara objected. "And are you already eating his cotton candy?"

She pointed to a bag that looked like some had been eaten.

"Calm down I'll buy another before we leave. Come on there is still some stuff going on outside."

She let him drag her outside of the tent, where some of the performers had come out for a few last tricks in the evening air.

"Hey, Dick?" Barbara said quietly as she stood next to him as they watched a juggler amaze the audience gathered around.

"Hmm?"

"Why are we here?"

There was a bit of silence.

"I guess I just woke up and felt nostalgic."

She wasn't buying this for a second.

"You just woke up and felt nostalgic for the circus?" She repeated.

He shrugged and kept his eyes on the juggler.

"Anything else?" She pried.

"I don't think so."

His answer was a bit rushed.

"So . . . it wasn't because you wanted to kiss me under the highest point of the big top?"

Dick's eyes got huge and his face flushed.

"Say what?" He asked at he rubbed the back of his neck. "Why would . . . where did you hear that?"

Barbara shrugged and gave an innocent smile.

"Blond-Tim." Dick muttered after a moment.

Barbara laughed.

"Don't call him that."

Dick gave a short smile but then looked serious.

"I guess I just . . . it seems silly, but I just remembered the story and well . . ." Dick blushed again. "It was . . ."

Barbara smiled as she watched him fumble for something to say. She could not believe that he faced going to a circus just for that reason alone.

"So _that _is really the reason why we are here?" She clarified.

He nodded.

"You panicked the entire household for _that_?"

Dick looked confused.

"What now?"

Barbara rolled her eyes. Leave it to Dick to be oblivious about everything else around him.

"Everyone has been in panic mode. Alfred, Tim, even Bruce for that matter—you had everyone on red alert!"

"Oh." Dick replied looking sheepish. "I guess I really wasn't thinking about what everyone thought. When I remembered . . . I guess I forgot my . . . hurt about

visiting the circus."

"It was a sweet thought." She said softly.

He shrugged, and still looked embarrassed.

"I'm glad everything is okay with you then."

"I didn't mean to worry you, or anyone else for that matter."

She wrapped her arms around his side and rested her head against her shoulder.

"It's fine then." She said, just happy that it wasn't anything serious.

Everyone else at the manor could relax now.

"Ready to go back?" He asked.

"Sure, if you want to."

He gave a nod and led the way towards the car.

"Babs?" He said pausing outside of her car.

"Yea?" She asked.

He was staring back towards the big top that was still illuminated by a spot light. His blue eyes looked soft.

"I'm not saying that it didn't hurt, just that it hurt less."

Barbara bit her lip.

To her knowledge, this was on the second time that he had been back to any circus since it happened all those years ago.

"I guess it's not just a pain feeling all the time; it's always mixed with some remorse. I just feel like I missing out on something."

"Hey." Barbara broke in. "You're in a whole different show now. It just takes place in the night sky instead of a tent."

Dick managed a smile.

"Yea, I know. I really wouldn't change that either."

She was glad to hear that.

"Maybe next time we can come and bring Tim." Dick offered.

Barbara nodded.

Maybe that time, the pain would be even less.

* * *

"Tim? Alfred? We're back." Dick called out as he opened the front door.

Tim's head poked around the corner.

"Hey." He said carefully eyeing Barbara.

"Hey." Dick replied looking confused. "I brought you a whole bag of cotton candy." He announced as he tossed it to the boy.

"Wow." Tim's eyes lit up.

"You might want to hide it though. You know how Alfred is about sweets." He warned.

Tim gave a firm nod and looked back over at Barbara.

"So . . . everything is okay?"

Barbara nodded.

"You freaked us out." Tim informed his older brother bluntly.

"Sorry." Dick apologized seriously, but then he started to grin.

"But I do want you to know that Barbara would like you better if you were blond and Italian."

"What?" Tim said sounding confused.

"That's not what I said Tim." Barbara argued taking a swipe at Dick. "Don't listen to him."

"Okay, so obviously something happened. Don't feel the need to tell me." Tim said as he walked off. Those two were always up to something.

"I told you not to tell him that." Barbara lectured.

Dick gasped. "So it's true!"

"It is not!" Barbara said with a laugh. She took a deep breath. "Well, I better be going and take a nap or else I'll be late to tonight's show."

"What? Oh, _that _show. Right." Dick said catching on. "We'll be there."

He leaned down and gave her a kiss.

"Love you."

She nodded her head.

"Per sempre?" She questioned.

Dick cocked his head. His face grew into a smile.

"Sempre per sempre." He promised.

* * *

**Random Ends Notes:** According to on-line resources, "Per Sempre" means "forever" or "always" in Italian.

I apologize to any Italian speaking people if this is wrong. On another note, I dreamed up this circus "legend" and then made an entire ridiculous story about it.

How to I dream this stuff up?

{Dick/Babs because, HELLO! They are perfect for each other!}

Alright you know the drill. Advice, and (gentle) [be nice please! :}] criticism, would be appreciated. Or a haiku if you feel like one.


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